5. Metagross (Sapphire)
“Metagross is the result of two Metang achieving fusion. When hunting, this Pokemon pins the prey to the ground under its massive body. It then eats the helpless victim using the large mouth on its stomach”
Most of us probably don’t typically think of Pokémon as predators, but as it turns out, a lot of Pokémon are pretty vicious and terrifying. Metagross is pretty high up there on the scary-scale, with a mouth that opens up on its stomach. Here’s hoping that “prey” in this entry refers to squirrels and raccoons (if they even exist in the Pokémon universe) and not some unassuming Pikachu.
~Jess Reed
4. Drifloon (Pearl)
“It tries to bring children to the underworld by pulling onto their hands, but it gets swung around instead.”
Now this one is just cute. Poor Drifloon – all it wants to do is drag children into the depths of hell, but because it’s a balloon, it ends up getting pulled around because it’s lighter than air. Now, when it evolves, it’s sure to have a little more luck, but the fact that this little balloon has so much trouble being a steward of Pokemon Satan is adorable to say the least.
~Alex Pizza
3. Slowking (Crystal)
“Every time it yawns, SHELLDER injects more poison into it. The poison makes it more intelligent.”
Now this one is just ridiculous. You’re telling me that a Slowking is becoming more intelligent from a Pokemon that is slowly killing it? I mean, perhaps, considering that the Slowpoke line was not very bright to begin with. But what is in the toxins in Shellder that makes it so potent in the mind of Slowking? The funniest part is that apparently Slowking works every day to solve the mysteries of life, but it forgets everything if you remove the Shellder from its head. So who’s the smart one, the Slowking, or the Shellder?
~Alex Pizza
2. Kadabra (FireRed)
“It happened one morning – a boy with extrasensory powers awoke in bed transformed into Kadabra.”
This PokeDex entry makes the list because it is equal parts creepy and incredibly silly. First of all, there have NEVER been rumors of a person turning into a Pokemon, ever, aside from this PokeDex entry. And are we supposed to believe that this boy turned into a Kadabra because he had supernatural powers? Or was it just coincidence that he turned into a Kadabra? Imagine waking up and realizing that you’d been turned into an animal, like a dolphin or a monkey. Jeez. Poor kid.